Midlife Dimensions


Praying for a 24-year marriage.

My husband and I are born again Christians and have been married for 24 years (together for 27). Over the past decade he experienced a lot of trauma. He came from a large family and over about an 8 year time span he had 7 close relatives pass away. We have always been close and I felt we really leaned on each other through these tragedies. About a year ago he became obsessed with working on his parents' house. At first he would work until midnight or after but always come home; eventually he just started spending the night there as well as drinking heavily. Also, over this past year, some health issues that he was dealing with came to light. Everyone who knows him is shocked by his complete change in personality. I have done a lot of reading and research and believe he exhibits a lot of midlife symptoms as well as grief. He still says that he loves me but spends most of his time shredding my character and criticizing me. I am so frustrated! I have prayed so much but maybe we need more voices - I sometimes feel I am fighting Satan himself. Getting help is a slow and frustrating process, even when he's willing, which is not most of the time. We have 3 children (2 adult and 1 still in high school) and he acts as if we are more of acquaintances. He has always been a great father and husband in the past. He says he is "trying" to come home but never makes it. Usually I see him for about a half hour each day - and that I have to ask for. This is crazy. We have always loved spending time together. I have tried not to push him but I know that our being separated is not God's will. Please pray for our marriage restoration.