Jim - I just wanted to write a quick thank you for all your help.
I know I probably seemed crazy when I called you, but I felt like my world had fallen apart and my heart would never mend. Well, my world did fall apart for a while and yes my heart is still mending. However, it was with the patient advice from you and the staff and other participants in the chat room that helped me through many of the lonely nights. I had decided not to go on the boards regularly after a while because I felt very lonely sometimes after I got off, but I have really been trying to continue the advice you gave me.
All my friends and family advised me to get rid of him and divorce him. But I didn’t listen.I do at times struggle with letting go of the fear of future recurrence and fear of being compared to a world that he has now had a taste of and may someday want again. I try very hard to put the pain in the past but the little devil keeps popping up. Having my husband back in my life is the absolute biggest blessing I have ever received. I know that he struggles too and sometimes I sense I am driving him crazy and life's pressures are on his heels. I just pray a lot that he will be with me forever and that I can learn to be the wife he wants and to understand the man he is.
Thank you so much and you are right, loving them unconditionally is the key. When my husband first left I just went crazy. He has told me several times that had I stayed in that mode he would have never even considered coming back to the marriage. But I didn’t. I loved him more, I tried to be kinder and sweeter than ever in our relationship. It was HARD - very very HARD. Even now I sometimes slide back to the 'old me' by mistake but I try to catch myself. He just wants to be loved and respected for who he is and who he can be without the ridicule and judgmental attitude. I do love my husband, there will never be regrets.
God Bless you all and that you do with your ministry. There just isn’t enough help out there for people like us.