Midlife Dimensions


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Being Honest with Your Sponsor and the Group

Deception, partial truth, and lying are some of the forces which will keep the person in the addictive process. Telling the truth -- the whole truth -- to your sponsor, your counselor, and to all your group members, will help you to break the back on lust.

Learning to relate honestly to your sponsor will help you to relate honestly to your mate, your children, people at work, God, and yourself. So don't live a double life with your sponsor. Tell your sponsor exactly what is going on. If you don't agree with your sponsors directions, talk about it. If you can't work out, may be should find a different sponsor.

For example, several men who are working on overcoming sexual addiction, have hidden some of their activities from their sponsors. One sponsor told his sponsee not to date, make phone calls to women, or even to have casual lunches with women.

The sponsee thought the sponsor was being oppressive and unreasonable. But instead of saying anything, He just ignored his sponsor. He started to see a woman and they got so deeply involved Then it threatened his sexual sobriety. Yet he refused to break it off with the woman.

He continued to lie to himself, as well as his sponsor, by saying, "I can control my lust, I won't slip, we won't go too far." The sponsor was very upset because his sponsee deceived him -- deliberately getting into a relationship. In several of these cases the sponsor threatened to quit being the person sponsor.

It was wrong to get into a relationship before the addictive habit had been broken. But that was not the greatest problem -- deception, and living a double life were the real culprits which kept feeding the addictive habit.

Tell your sponsor the truth and don't lie to other group members. Do whenever your sponsor says, even if it doesn't make sense to you at the beginning. They are not try to make your life miserable -- they only want to help you have victory over lust.

Conway / Farrel Articles ~    Reprint by permission only,  ©2011

Midlife Dimensions ~ www.Midlife.com


The Conways and Farrels are international speakers and popular authors.

Midlife Dimensions is a ministry founded by the Conways and continued by the Farrels.