Most people who have trouble with sexual addiction come from dysfunctional families. There seems to be some common threads of abuse which starts in childhoodâ€”sexual abuse, physical abuse, verbal abuse, or psychological abuse. Many people who struggle with lust have also come from divorced homes, or homes where there was no love.
A dysfunctional home life sets a person up to become a sexual addict. While it is important to understand your childhood past, and to heal those areas, it is also important not to hide behind that past. You cannot excuse yourself, or your faulty adult behaviors, by blaming your parental past.
Yes, they were the major factors which contributed to the type of person you have become. The dysfunction of your family, in all its many forms, were like the tentacles of a an octopus wrapping around you. But they only "pre-disposed" you to act out sexuallyâ€”they did not force you to become a sexual addict.
Now the question is, "Will you take responsibility for your own life?" But the common mindset of the addict is to feel sorry for themselves about their pathetic life. Then they remember that it always felt good to be sexually acting out. The pity party pushes them to search for their sexual drug which will make them forget all their pain.
But now is time to resist all of the pity party attitudes. Resist blaming your dysfunctional family, and even resist blaming God that he allowed this to happen to you. It's time to take a standâ€”to be an adultâ€”to be sexually sober.
Every time you connect to God, attend a meeting, have your daily quiet time, call your sponsor, see your counselor, or work on your 12 steps, you are making the choice for a wholenessâ€”away from your dysfunctional family. You're finally cutting off all of the tentacles of addiction which have been passed down to you from your dysfunctional family.
Conway / Farrel Articles ~ Reprint by permission only, ©2011
Midlife Dimensions ~ www.Midlife.com
The Conways and Farrels are international speakers and popular authors.
Midlife Dimensions is a ministry founded by the Conways and continued by the Farrels.