Trying to Be Fulfilled by Others?

Imagine a young couple parked on Lovers Lane overlooking the lights of the city. Their kissing becomes more and more passionate. He whispers that he loves her, and that she is the only woman in his life. Then he says those classic words, "I want to give you more than just kissing, I what to have sex with you so that I can show you how much I love you. I want to make you my woman".

She believes his lie and they have sex. Only later does she realize that he was a "user". He wasn't thinking of her needs—he was focusing on his passion. He wasn't trying to deepen his commitment with her—he was trying to exploit her because he did know how to control his lust.

To gain victory over lust you must be brutally honest with yourself. When you love someone you want the very best for them—even at the sacrifice of what you want. But lust is very selfish—lust wants only what is best for you.

I'm sure you have "conned" yourself by this common lie—“I'm sure that she really enjoys this". Does that prostitute you picked up enjoy sex, or just need the money? Or what about the woman that you keep staring at in the office? Do you think she enjoys your sexual staring?

What about the porno magazine, video, or nudes on the Internet—is there any love in any of this? Aren't they just using you for money? And aren't you doing the same—using them for your sexual lust?

Continually think of love as sacrifice—and lust as selfish. Ask God to fill up that emptiness within so you will be able to love people—to give yourself for what is best for them.

Conway / Farrel Articles ~    Reprint by permission only,  ©2011

Midlife Dimensions ~


The Conways and Farrels are international speakers and popular authors.

Midlife Dimensions is a ministry founded by the Conways and continued by the Farrels.