A. There were many times I reacted to my husband in a way that I later wished I hadn't. I finally got to a point where I realized God could use it all. You do not know what your husband needed to see at that moment. If you feel it was not who you wanted to be....then get back on track now, but trust God that He will use it all.
If you read Jim's book, he refers to the difficulty in breaking off the adulterous relationship. They now have feelings of responsibility to this person that they do not know how to get out of. You can imagine that the other woman knows this too and can play on the guilt that they may be feeling from pulling back from the relationship. This is where they may really be able to see the contrast between a relationship that is controlled by guilt and your relationship that is inspired by God's love. You may want to let him wear himself out trying to "make things right"....so much so that he cannot bear to be a part of it any longer.