Midlife Dimensions

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Q. Most days I’m ok - today was a bad day, though. I just keep thinking, "How can he think it's ok to be living at home with his wife & having an affair at the same time - knowing that I know." It's like being punched in the face daily.

A.   I've been in your same situation. In fact, many of us have, as our husbands have left, and returned home, and then continued to be in touch with the other woman while preparing to leave again. It's a roller-coaster ride. You need to stay strong in the Lord, and I highly recommend protecting yourself should you continue to have intimate relations with your husband. You know, just as much as you hate him being home and having an “other woman’ at the same time, you should also know that the other woman hates the fact that he's home with you. This will make her quite jealous and insecure. This will cause her to be manipulative and demanding. If you can stay strong, yet sweet and innocent, continuing to make dinner, clean, love, etc., (but not be a doormat), then you'll continue to have 1-up on her. You're perfect for the book, "The Excellent Wife" by Martha Peace in your situation.