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August 15, 2017 / Tuesday

Kmkrn: buttons - A side note to that is that my H took the ow to Jazz Fest while he was with her, so it was a hard pill to swallow when he wanted to go back there again with me, but now we've been a few times, so I'm better about it.

buttons: Kmkrn that would be a bit challenging, it's like when I hear a song H listened to over and over again in the first year or two, since he was home I heard them often! Now I cringe less but sometimes it's still tough

For a list of media recommendations by Midlife Dimensions and our Chat Room Facilitators, please visit at

http://love-wise.com/product.php

or http://astore.amazon.com/midlife-20  
 Amazon sends a donation to the non-profit ministry of Midlife Dimensions anytime an order is placed via our link. We hope you enjoy the various lists of recommendations and thank you for supporting Midlife Dimensions through Amazon.
 

If this Chat Room Session has helped you or ministered to your heart, please consider sponsoring 1 Chat Room a month to help us keep our Chat Rooms active and Archives updated. Each session costs us $30 to host, edit, and post.

We can't do it without your help. Thanks for caring.  Be A Chat Room Sponsor

August 15, 2017 / Tuesday

Kmkrn: Swan - Hello!

Swan: Hello everyone, welcome to Tuesday evening chat

Swan: Hi KmKrn

Swan: KmKrn - at what point did you share with your husband that you were involved with the MLD chat room? Some, even those who have their husband's at home or reconcile, never shared about MLD. I am not saying we should go into details, but I just wonder if keeping it from them is not being honest.

Swan: KmKrn - My children have always known that I am involved here, but neither of them approve. I never really went into detail about the site, but they were free to look for themselves. At first they attempted to scold me about the site and how I needed to move on with my life, now it is a topic that is off the table, I don't talk about it and they don't give their opinions anymore.

Kmkrn: Swan - I told him while he was not living at home. He called me and asked what I was doing. I said, "I'm in a chat room." He said, "A sex chat room?" and I said, "NO!" and told him about MLD. So, he has known for a LONG time. He never says anything about it, it's OK with him, but as you know he is not interested.

Kmkrn: Swan - My kids know about this chat room as well. They have never had a strong opinion one way or another, but they know that their mom likes to help people, so it's all good.

Swan: KmKrn - I didn't tell my husband about support on line, but the first other woman located me on another site, it didn't have a chat but used what they called threads, basically you had a page and people could leave comments and when you commented back, it linked to their page. She told him about my page and even attempted to bait me by saying some horrible things to get me to react in a negative manner. I didn't, but she made it appear as if I had, when he confronted me I showed him my actual page and exactly what she had said as well. He got so upset that I was sharing my hurt with others, so I never really told him about MLD, but we were separated when I found it. I don't think I would keep it from him, but wouldn't expect him to approve either.

Swan: Hi buttons

buttons: hello ladies

Kmkrn: Swan - I am so naively honest that it didn't occur to me to lie. I don't lie well, so I generally don't.

Kmkrn: buttons - Hi!

Kmkrn: Swan - And you can tell by his response that he was a full blown MLC!

Swan: KmKrn - I am with you, I never kept anything from him when we were married, and I just don't know that I could. I had someone ask me if they should hide it from their husband and I said no, but then got to thinking that since I didn't really have that as an option, maybe I gave wrong information. Thanks

Kmkrn: Swan - That's always good advice.

buttons: Ladies with my H home I either did not go into chat when he was in the room or would chat when he was very focused on chatting with ___ ? IF he asked I'd just say there's a Christian chat room I've found and I'm talking to some of them.

Kmkrn: buttons - That works too. Has he ever asked?

buttons: kmkrn at this point he's met Cricket and I have told him some but not in depth what the chat room is about a Christian chat with people supporting each other.

buttons: kmkrn now he hasn't asked in quite a while, he knows I sometimes chat with a group of others

Kmkrn: buttons - Ha! Ha! My H has met Cricket as well! She sure gets around!

Swan: KmKrn - I remember when my husband had walked into our bedroom and threw a stack of papers at me, the print out of the conversations from my thread. I looked at them and maybe 10 percent was what I had ever actually said. It was a stop in your tracks kind of moment as he was screaming at me and I asked him just how his girlfriend found me on the website in the first place. He so calmly said, oh she did a search on me (she was or still is a police officer) and knew what kind of sites I had been visiting, to which I pointed out that she must be searching him as well since we both used the same computer. They got into a big fight over that, not sure on details, but do know that they broke up a couple weeks later. His mind was so foggy, that even though he knew what she had done, he wanted to believe I was the bad guy and used that to justify going on line and finding the second other woman.

buttons: Kmkrn yes, she does, she was able to get an apartment for a week here and came over our July holiday

Swan: buttons - see that seems good, they don't need to know the details until they ask in depth, but saying a Christian support group is what MLD is.

Kmkrn: buttons - We met her at Jazz Fest in New Orleans a couple of years ago.

buttons: swan exactly

buttons: kmkrn right, I remember you and her talking about that a little

Kmkrn: Swan - We do make the best scapegoats when they want to justify their actions. :0

buttons: ladies they sure do

Kmkrn: ALL - Did you notice that my prayer requests were a little outdated? (They were from last year when we went to the Olympics in Brazil)! I teased our coordinator a little about that. I told her not to worry about it and to just keep it that way since she works hard enough.

buttons: Kmkrn sorry, I have been really bad about reading prayer requests or much of anything right now, normally I read them and pm the people but have slipped this last while.

Kmkrn: buttons - A side note to that is that my H took the ow to Jazz Fest while he was with her, so it was a hard pill to swallow when he wanted to go back there again with me, but now we've been a few times, so I'm better about it.

Swan: KmKrn - That goes to show how much I know about the Olympics, even with my grandson being in the junior's last year, I have been praying for them thinking you guys were having a lot of excitement going on.

buttons: Kmkrn that would be a bit challenging, it's like when I hear a song H listened to over and over again in the first year or two, since he was home I heard them often! Now I cringe less but sometimes it's still tough

Kmkrn: ALL - I know what you mean, I do that too.

Kmkrn: buttons - Yup!

Swan: KmKrn - there is a venue here that my husband and I went to every year for many years and I found out after the fact that he still got tickets and took the other woman. At first I got hurt, then angry, then thought about it and wondered if he was able to be there and not think of all the times we had gone, even if he was there with her.

Kmkrn: Swan - I'm sure it backfired on him and he thought about you the whole time!

buttons: Kmkrn I'm sure that's what would have happened

Swan: Ladies - this is how bad their thinking is, my husband asked my daughter to get the tickets for him from my office, we had really good seats contracted. She told him no and he ended up getting the tickets from Ticket Master and paid their fees, plus wasn't able to get center front seats. I am so glad he didn't think to actually ask me or come to my office to buy the tickets, because my staff would have told me if he had.

Kmkrn: ALL - I just listened to a great book (audio book) called "Proof of Heaven" by Eben Alexander, M.D. about a neurosurgeon who was in a coma for a week.

buttons: Kmkrn interesting

Swan: I love audio books that sounds like a good book, I will have to look for it, and I am about ready for a new read

Kmkrn: ALL - It's one I would listen to again to remember more details. Very comforting too.

Kmkrn: ALL - It's also a miracle really that he lived to tell his story.

buttons: All I have read two good ones this last year. One was about a young woman who tried to commit suicide by laying across the train tracks, for all intensive purposes she SHOULD HAVE DIED! She lost her legs but lived. It was a tough read at times however very good. The other one was about a woman who ended up badly burned in a plane crash, her husband was hurt and a friend died, that was an "easier" read but still tough

buttons: Kmkrn the book sounds like a good one, right now I'm trying to get through one that sounds really good but uses some big words and is a bit slow getting going. I also have one waiting called "The Room" which is based on true events

Kmkrn: buttons - You don't pick the "happily ever after" books, do you?

buttons: Kmkrn they both called my name at the Christian book store, no I didn't in those cases, and they are a contrast to "Due to Rising Energy Costs the Light at the Tunnel has been turned off", which is about being happy no matter events and "Smile for No Good Reason"

Kmkrn: buttons - "The Shack" told me that I had to read that book, I didn't want to, but I'm glad I finally did. I liked the movie too.

Swan: buttons - that is kind of like fake it till you make it, I remember smiling so hard when I was crying inside, but I just couldn't let the world see how torn apart I was.

buttons: Kmkrn I think I've heard of that

buttons: swan yeah that's how it is for me sometimes. I had an interesting conversation with one of the ladies I meet up with walking dogs in the evening, she shared how she's not happy in her place and others don't understand why but she felt I would

Kmkrn: ALL - I also just bought "The Book of Joy" with the Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu, but I haven't read it yet.

buttons: swan she'd lived in a townhouse pretty much across the street which she really liked however some scary things occurred so she and her husband sold when they got a chance to buy a friend's townhouse (one level) nearby

Swan: Ladies I am going to head out, I am cooking tonight and need to get dinner ready

buttons: swan she had the place renovated, etc. but she just doesn't really like the place

buttons: swan night, have a great evening and supper

buttons: Hugs and prayers to both of you

Kmkrn: ALL - Good night and God bless! XOXOXO

Kmkrn: buttons - A side note to that is that my H took the ow to Jazz Fest while he was with her, so it was a hard pill to swallow when he wanted to go back there again with me, but now we've been a few times, so I'm better about it.

buttons: Kmkrn that would be a bit challenging, it's like when I hear a song H listened to over and over again in the first year or two, since he was home I heard them often! Now I cringe less but sometimes it's still tough

For a list of media recommendations by Midlife Dimensions and our Chat Room Facilitators, please visit at

http://love-wise.com/product.php

or http://astore.amazon.com/midlife-20  
 Amazon sends a donation to the non-profit ministry of Midlife Dimensions anytime an order is placed via our link. We hope you enjoy the various lists of recommendations and thank you for supporting Midlife Dimensions through Amazon.
 

If this Chat Room Session has helped you or ministered to your heart, please consider sponsoring 1 Chat Room a month to help us keep our Chat Rooms active and Archives updated. Each session costs us $30 to host, edit, and post.

We can't do it without your help. Thanks for caring.  Be A Chat Room Sponsor

August 15, 2017 / Tuesday

Kmkrn: Swan - Hello!

Swan: Hello everyone, welcome to Tuesday evening chat

Swan: Hi KmKrn

Swan: KmKrn - at what point did you share with your husband that you were involved with the MLD chat room? Some, even those who have their husband's at home or reconcile, never shared about MLD. I am not saying we should go into details, but I just wonder if keeping it from them is not being honest.

Swan: KmKrn - My children have always known that I am involved here, but neither of them approve. I never really went into detail about the site, but they were free to look for themselves. At first they attempted to scold me about the site and how I needed to move on with my life, now it is a topic that is off the table, I don't talk about it and they don't give their opinions anymore.

Kmkrn: Swan - I told him while he was not living at home. He called me and asked what I was doing. I said, "I'm in a chat room." He said, "A sex chat room?" and I said, "NO!" and told him about MLD. So, he has known for a LONG time. He never says anything about it, it's OK with him, but as you know he is not interested.

Kmkrn: Swan - My kids know about this chat room as well. They have never had a strong opinion one way or another, but they know that their mom likes to help people, so it's all good.

Swan: KmKrn - I didn't tell my husband about support on line, but the first other woman located me on another site, it didn't have a chat but used what they called threads, basically you had a page and people could leave comments and when you commented back, it linked to their page. She told him about my page and even attempted to bait me by saying some horrible things to get me to react in a negative manner. I didn't, but she made it appear as if I had, when he confronted me I showed him my actual page and exactly what she had said as well. He got so upset that I was sharing my hurt with others, so I never really told him about MLD, but we were separated when I found it. I don't think I would keep it from him, but wouldn't expect him to approve either.

Swan: Hi buttons

buttons: hello ladies

Kmkrn: Swan - I am so naively honest that it didn't occur to me to lie. I don't lie well, so I generally don't.

Kmkrn: buttons - Hi!

Kmkrn: Swan - And you can tell by his response that he was a full blown MLC!

Swan: KmKrn - I am with you, I never kept anything from him when we were married, and I just don't know that I could. I had someone ask me if they should hide it from their husband and I said no, but then got to thinking that since I didn't really have that as an option, maybe I gave wrong information. Thanks

Kmkrn: Swan - That's always good advice.

buttons: Ladies with my H home I either did not go into chat when he was in the room or would chat when he was very focused on chatting with ___ ? IF he asked I'd just say there's a Christian chat room I've found and I'm talking to some of them.

Kmkrn: buttons - That works too. Has he ever asked?

buttons: kmkrn at this point he's met Cricket and I have told him some but not in depth what the chat room is about a Christian chat with people supporting each other.

buttons: kmkrn now he hasn't asked in quite a while, he knows I sometimes chat with a group of others

Kmkrn: buttons - Ha! Ha! My H has met Cricket as well! She sure gets around!

Swan: KmKrn - I remember when my husband had walked into our bedroom and threw a stack of papers at me, the print out of the conversations from my thread. I looked at them and maybe 10 percent was what I had ever actually said. It was a stop in your tracks kind of moment as he was screaming at me and I asked him just how his girlfriend found me on the website in the first place. He so calmly said, oh she did a search on me (she was or still is a police officer) and knew what kind of sites I had been visiting, to which I pointed out that she must be searching him as well since we both used the same computer. They got into a big fight over that, not sure on details, but do know that they broke up a couple weeks later. His mind was so foggy, that even though he knew what she had done, he wanted to believe I was the bad guy and used that to justify going on line and finding the second other woman.

buttons: Kmkrn yes, she does, she was able to get an apartment for a week here and came over our July holiday

Swan: buttons - see that seems good, they don't need to know the details until they ask in depth, but saying a Christian support group is what MLD is.

Kmkrn: buttons - We met her at Jazz Fest in New Orleans a couple of years ago.

buttons: swan exactly

buttons: kmkrn right, I remember you and her talking about that a little

Kmkrn: Swan - We do make the best scapegoats when they want to justify their actions. :0

buttons: ladies they sure do

Kmkrn: ALL - Did you notice that my prayer requests were a little outdated? (They were from last year when we went to the Olympics in Brazil)! I teased our coordinator a little about that. I told her not to worry about it and to just keep it that way since she works hard enough.

buttons: Kmkrn sorry, I have been really bad about reading prayer requests or much of anything right now, normally I read them and pm the people but have slipped this last while.

Kmkrn: buttons - A side note to that is that my H took the ow to Jazz Fest while he was with her, so it was a hard pill to swallow when he wanted to go back there again with me, but now we've been a few times, so I'm better about it.

Swan: KmKrn - That goes to show how much I know about the Olympics, even with my grandson being in the junior's last year, I have been praying for them thinking you guys were having a lot of excitement going on.

buttons: Kmkrn that would be a bit challenging, it's like when I hear a song H listened to over and over again in the first year or two, since he was home I heard them often! Now I cringe less but sometimes it's still tough

Kmkrn: ALL - I know what you mean, I do that too.

Kmkrn: buttons - Yup!

Swan: KmKrn - there is a venue here that my husband and I went to every year for many years and I found out after the fact that he still got tickets and took the other woman. At first I got hurt, then angry, then thought about it and wondered if he was able to be there and not think of all the times we had gone, even if he was there with her.

Kmkrn: Swan - I'm sure it backfired on him and he thought about you the whole time!

buttons: Kmkrn I'm sure that's what would have happened

Swan: Ladies - this is how bad their thinking is, my husband asked my daughter to get the tickets for him from my office, we had really good seats contracted. She told him no and he ended up getting the tickets from Ticket Master and paid their fees, plus wasn't able to get center front seats. I am so glad he didn't think to actually ask me or come to my office to buy the tickets, because my staff would have told me if he had.

Kmkrn: ALL - I just listened to a great book (audio book) called "Proof of Heaven" by Eben Alexander, M.D. about a neurosurgeon who was in a coma for a week.

buttons: Kmkrn interesting

Swan: I love audio books that sounds like a good book, I will have to look for it, and I am about ready for a new read

Kmkrn: ALL - It's one I would listen to again to remember more details. Very comforting too.

Kmkrn: ALL - It's also a miracle really that he lived to tell his story.

buttons: All I have read two good ones this last year. One was about a young woman who tried to commit suicide by laying across the train tracks, for all intensive purposes she SHOULD HAVE DIED! She lost her legs but lived. It was a tough read at times however very good. The other one was about a woman who ended up badly burned in a plane crash, her husband was hurt and a friend died, that was an "easier" read but still tough

buttons: Kmkrn the book sounds like a good one, right now I'm trying to get through one that sounds really good but uses some big words and is a bit slow getting going. I also have one waiting called "The Room" which is based on true events

Kmkrn: buttons - You don't pick the "happily ever after" books, do you?

buttons: Kmkrn they both called my name at the Christian book store, no I didn't in those cases, and they are a contrast to "Due to Rising Energy Costs the Light at the Tunnel has been turned off", which is about being happy no matter events and "Smile for No Good Reason"

Kmkrn: buttons - "The Shack" told me that I had to read that book, I didn't want to, but I'm glad I finally did. I liked the movie too.

Swan: buttons - that is kind of like fake it till you make it, I remember smiling so hard when I was crying inside, but I just couldn't let the world see how torn apart I was.

buttons: Kmkrn I think I've heard of that

buttons: swan yeah that's how it is for me sometimes. I had an interesting conversation with one of the ladies I meet up with walking dogs in the evening, she shared how she's not happy in her place and others don't understand why but she felt I would

Kmkrn: ALL - I also just bought "The Book of Joy" with the Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu, but I haven't read it yet.

buttons: swan she'd lived in a townhouse pretty much across the street which she really liked however some scary things occurred so she and her husband sold when they got a chance to buy a friend's townhouse (one level) nearby

Swan: Ladies I am going to head out, I am cooking tonight and need to get dinner ready

buttons: swan she had the place renovated, etc. but she just doesn't really like the place

buttons: swan night, have a great evening and supper

buttons: Hugs and prayers to both of you

Kmkrn: ALL - Good night and God bless! XOXOXO