Midlife Dimensions

www.MIDLIFE.com

July 04, 2014

6:27 PM

finding nemo

all - I need all the prayer I can get, my daughter is angry with her dad tonight because he was supposed to take her to see fireworks; we have not heard a word from him.

6:30 PM

Beth

finding nemo I know it is hard on your D. I had a teen when my H left. There were times when my heart nearly broke for her. Encourage your D to text him, call him sometime. Encourage her to keep in contact with him. I told my children no matter what happened between their father and myself he still needed them and they needed him.

 

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Christmas Eve, 2014

5:24 PM

finding nemo

Swan - I kind of have a problem with the video and photos because I feel like I am being cheated. Why does he reap rewards for not stepping up to her dad?

5:26 PM

swan

finding nemo - You are in many ways being cheated, however, he is also losing major even though he might not realize it at this time. Consider it more as offering a blessing to him and helping the relationship between him and his daughter, do it for her.

 

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Loving God, Loving others, on Valentine's Day

The heartbeat of Christianity is love, the kind of love that sacrifices for the wellbeing of another. Phil. 2:3-5 expressed the goal of a good way to make everyday a Valentine’s Day.

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus…”

So for Valentine’s Day, or any day this week, try showing the love of Christ by placing someone’s needs above your own:

Honor your parents. If they are married to each other, create a “this is your love” night where they can retell their love story, and the special memories along their life path, over a lovely dinner with their kids and grandkids. Go the extra mile and cook his and hers favorite foods. (If your folks are divorced, plan a heart healing night out where you treat your mom or dad to a dinner out, or a home cooked meal, and tell him/her thanks for being your parent.)

Host a party with a purpose. Select a missions project, third world need, or local charity and have everyone who attends the party bring a contribution. An easy option is a dinner party where each person brings the nonperishables for a family to make a dinner then donate those goods to a local food pantry. Other options could be a “Diva Dinner” and all bring make up and personal toiletries to donate to a women’s shelter, or a “Sole” food dinner where you can serve authentic soul food, and then all participants donate their shoes (soles) to homeless shelter.

Take time off, around Valentine’s, to do charity work in a third world country or spend a day or weekend on a service project in the inner city or a poverty zone in the rural countryside. (To find local charities, talk with your pastor, the Missions pastor, a local Christian bookstore, or check the local Christian newspaper or website in your city).

Host a mixer or dinner party and invite your closest friends, but ask each friend to bring two friends and widen your social circle.

  • For women: Have a girlfriends’ gathering: Each bring your favorite appetizers (or food for a potluck) and spend time laughing together. Try a theme, like an 80’s party, or an evening of Bunco.
  • For men: Call the guys together and do something to boost testosterone: golf, racquetball, the batting cages, skeet shooting, then add on something to prove you are a true gentleman: shovel snow off some elderly people’s sidewalks, pool your wisdom to tune up each other’s cars, or strap on your tool belts and dive into a home improvement project.
  • Host a contest: a chili cook-off; best chocolate dessert culinary challenge; a bike race or fun run. Take your favorite hobby and put out the word through social media of a meet up and match off!

Have a blast to the past with one of these activities of enjoyed as a teen:

  • Road Trip!: Take a road trip to a Christian conference or concert. Volunteer to spearhead the carpool and mix up the passengers to build some new friendships. To make things more interesting, rotate seats in cars along the route at each stop.
  • A Car Rally: Leave clues around town and create teams for a photo at each location.
  • A Geo Cache: Enjoy the outdoors with a group using your GPS, compass and sense of adventure as you locate the “cache” with some teamwork.
  • A Progressive Dinner: Go from home to home in your friendship circle and have one course of a meal in each place.

The common thread in these ideas is initiative. Make time to pray for the Lord’s guidance, and allow Him to lead you in what project you can do to show Christ’s love on, or around, Valentine’s Day. Don’t be afraid to be bold! Be brave! Be the one who makes things happen! 

 

Farrel Articles ~  Reprint by permission only,  ©2014
Midlife Dimensions ~ www.Midlife.com

 

The Farrels are international speakers and popular authors.
Midlife Dimensions is a ministry founded by the Conways and continued by the Farrels.

 

Valentine's Day 2014

6:10 PM

dumbfounded2

surety - It is so very hard when you do not hear from them.

 

6:11 PM

 

surety

 

dumbfounded2 it is, I agree, but is it strange that I have this incredible peace. I love him to death, but he needs Jesus bad, and so that is my focus for us right now. He would have to be a new man in Christ for us to ever work together.

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Christmas Day - 2013

6:38 PM

Tiger

yoli - I went from my parents house to my first husband, then we got divorced, I had my kids, then I met and married my H, 2 kids were still home, they graduated and moved out, then it was only me and H, then He left, me all alone

6:40 PM

yoli

Tiger I even told my h to wait until younger daughter graduated and left. That it would be just the two of us. He said that's what scared him. So what is he doing now? All the things that I always wanted to do. Except he takes the woman everywhere, the woman has got it made.

 

 

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New Year's Day - 2014

6:03 PM

Tiger

swan - and you want to keep it that way, right? at least I know she will never go to something she knows I'm at, for now, anyways

6:04 PM

swan

Tiger - I never want to meet the other woman, but I don't like that she tells others she is afraid of me, that I would harm her. But those she has made those comments to, also know me and that even though I have the ability, I never would.

 

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Thanksgiving ~ 2013

6:48 PM

HopinginHim

Bluesky - I am laughing at that one. When we first met, he actually came to one of my dance recitals. He was so proud. He can't dance worth a bean!!!

6:48 PM

Bluesky

HopinginHim but it shows him you are moving forward with your life and getting hobbies.

 

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Holidays are tough ~ Suggestions from Dr. Jim Conway to help you through this time of year.

Holidays are tough for people in unhappy marriages when everyone else seems so happy. Depression is higher during the holidays than any other time of year. It's important to make plans and be proactive. Don’t allow yourself to be overwhelmed, lonely, and depressed. Doing these types of activities helps change your brain chemistry, which enables you to cope with life better.

1) Spend time with encouraging friends.

2) Plan a special event/activity that will nourish you.

3) Ask for extra prayer from your support group.

4) Spend extra time with God, in His Word, listening to praise music.

5) Make time to exercise, go walking with close friends, or better yet -- just you and God.

6) Volunteer in your community, or church, to take meals to people in need, serve meals at a shelter, etc.

7) Deliberately get outside your needs to see other's needs and how you can help them.

New Year’s Day Special Session - 1/1/13

7:02 PM

digforhelp

Swan her sister told me she fears her sister locking her out of her life. So she says nothing.

7:03 PM

Swan

digforhelp - that is common, Cricket's husband's family stopped all communication with her when he married the other woman, later they reconnected with her and told her how much they missed her and wanted to stay in contact with her but were afraid they would be locked out of her husband's life.

 

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Chat Room Acronyms

Guests often use acronyms to speed up their conversations. Here are a few examples for you:

I have been S from my H for 2 years. We have 3 children, S8, S13, and D16.
I have been Separated from my Husband for 2 years. We have 3 children, Son age 8, Son age 13, Daughter age 16.
  OW = Other Woman   AW  = Adulteress Woman   W  = Wife   OP = other person
  OM  = Other Man   AM  = Adulteress Man   H  = Husband   LBS = Left behind spouse
  D = divorce or daughter   S = son or sister or separated   XW  = ex-wife   GF = Girl Friend
  DIL = daughter-in-law   SIL = Sister-in-law or Son-in-law   XH  = ex-husband   BF = Boy Friend
  MIL = mother-in-law   MLC = Midlife Crisis   PG = Praise God   CS = Child Support
  FIL = father-in-law   MLD = Midlife Dimensions Ministry   PTL = Praise the Lord   ED = Erectile Dysfunction
  w/ = with   w/e = weekend   b/c = because   
  w/o = without   BRB / be right back   LOL / laughing out loud