Midlife Dimensions

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Thanksgiving - 11/24/11

6:18 PM

nutterbutter

Swan: Why is the MLC'r so selfish!

6:25 PM

Swan

nutterbutter - Because emotionally they are about three and that is a very selfish age!!  Because there is something inside of them telling them that they have done everything in their lives for someone else, it started with trying to please their parents, teachers, other adults, then as they became adults, employers, friends, spouses, children, etc.  For whatever reason they feel that they have always had to put themselves last and now they are rebelling and putting themselves first and behaving very selfishly in the pursuit of that.

 

 

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November 24, 2011 / Thursday 6-8 pm PST / Special Thanksgiving Day Chat

6:04 PM

Swan

Welcome everyone to this special Thanksgiving Day Chat. 

6:04 PM

Swan

1 Corinthians 13 - 1 If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn't love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God's secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn't love others, I would be nothing. 3 If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it; but if I didn't love others, I would have gained nothing. 4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

6:05 PM

Swan

I thank you God, because the Blood of our Lord Jesus Christ is against Satan and because of this he has no authority over our lives.  I bind every evil plan made, break off every power of darkness and cancel every argument that has established itself against the plans of God in our lives and spoil every attack of the enemy.  I call forth, all of God's plans You have for us.  They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give us a future and a hope (Jeremiah 29:11).  I claim God's plans for us now, for no weapon formed against us shall prosper (Isaiah 54:17)!  Satan is rendered helpless in his activities in our lives; he is loosed from his assignment against us and his power is broken from us in the Name of Jesus.

6:05 PM

Swan

Welcome nutterbutter

6:06 PM

nutterbutter

Hi Swan, Happy Thanksgiving to you!

6:06 PM

Hannah

happy thanksgiving Swan and nutterbutter

6:07 PM

nutterbutter

Hannah: Hi and Happy Thanksgiving to you too.

6:08 PM

Swan

Hannah - Hey lady, how has your day been?  Mine has been quiet, spoke to my daughter and sister earlier.

6:08 PM

Beth

Good evening

6:08 PM

nutterbutter

Hi Beth.

6:08 PM

Swan

Welcome Beth and digforhelp, thank you for joining us tonight

6:08 PM

nutterbutter

Hi digforhelp!

6:09 PM

Hannah

hi digforhelp

6:09 PM

digforhelp

Hello everyone. Happy thanksgiving.

6:10 PM

Hannah

Swan mine was good but too much food. I am glad you got to talk to your sister and daughter.  I spent mine with my son and his family and my daughter. We were at my son's in-laws.  A nice day.

6:10 PM

Hannah

Hi Beth

6:10 PM

Hannah

Swan did you get to talk to your brother?

6:10 PM

digforhelp

All - my wife chose today to tell me she wants to MOVE ON. Again. She wants me to sign the legal separation papers. Pretty much spoiled my day.

6:12 PM

Hannah

digforhelp I am so sorry.  What will happen if you don't sign it?

6:12 PM

Swan

Hannah - Yeah, I talked to the whole clan.  My daughter and son in law arrived at my sister's this afternoon and is staying with them for a couple days then heading down here.  My brother lives in the little apartment my brother in law build in their basement for my mother, so they are all together.

6:13 PM

nutterbutter

digforhelp: Sorry to hear that digforhelp.

6:13 PM

Beth

Hannah and whoever I have a problem. I felt I should write my H and apologize to me H for something about a week or so ago. Tonight I get an email back and he is mad about something. he told me if I have anything to say about him to tell him and not the kids. He was saying something along the line of me saying things to my kids about him and ow.

6:13 PM

digforhelp

Hannah - I don't know. she told me I need to look it over and send it back to her lawyers in two weeks.

6:13 PM

Hannah

swan that is nice. I bet you can't wait to see them.

6:14 PM

Hannah

digforhelp find out if she can get a legal separation if you don't sign the papers

6:14 PM

digforhelp

Hannah - but as I look at the papers there are so many changes that need to be made I don't know how to begin. I can't afford a lawyer. I'm trying to get my daughter through college.

6:15 PM

digforhelp

Hannah - I will check on that. I think if I don't sign it will go into court.

6:17 PM

Beth

Hannah and all I did not know what he is talking about. I thought he was talking about when he was up there in Sept, Oct. I was talking to D about something else and I spoke to her about the email. She is caught in between. I found out he sent shirts to the 2 grandsons and she took a picture of it and put on facebook and only said poppy send it not ow.

6:18 PM

nutterbutter

Swan: Why is the MLC'r so selfish!

6:18 PM

Beth

Hannah he is mad because D never put it was from ow too and D told him I would not like it if she did that.

6:19 PM

Swan

digforhelp - Holidays create enough stress and pressure for everyone, but for the MLC person it seems to cause a greater sense of desire to escape.  They just seem to need to...  Always need to do this or that and then it will all be fine, sadly what they don't know and we cannot tell them is until they face and begin to deal with the base cause of their MLC, nothing they do is going to help that feeling of desperation they are feeling.  As for the separation papers, I would say to be very careful in what you sign.  Check in your area for legal aide, they may not be able to represent you in court, but can usually at least read through any legal documents and give advice.

6:20 PM

Hannah

Beth you are caught in the middle. 

6:22 PM

digforhelp

Swan - thanks. It seems she's a completely different person. I don't know if I even like her the way she is now. she all about herself. everything is what she wants.

6:23 PM

Beth

Hannah I apologized for something I really feel I had to now this. He will think I did not mean it. Besides D is caught in middle. True I do not like to see things from her too.I told D to put it back on and put down who gave it to them.

6:25 PM

Swan

nutterbutter - Because emotionally they are about three and that is a very selfish age!!  Because there is something inside of them telling them that they have done everything in their lives for someone else, it started with trying to please their parents, teachers, other adults, then as they became adults, employers, friends, spouses, children, etc.  For whatever reason they feel that they have always had to put themselves last and now they are rebelling and putting themselves first and behaving very selfishly in the pursuit of that.

6:26 PM

digforhelp

Swan - the strange thing is that it's like she's going back to the very beginning. This is what she said last year. and now she's saying it again.

6:27 PM

digforhelp

Swan - @25 yep, that seems to describe my wife perfectly.

6:27 PM

Swan

digforhelp - I can tell you that I love my husband deeply; however, I do not like his choices or behavior at this point.  He is a very angry, selfish man right now and for now, I don't care to be around him.  Which I guess is a good thing, since there is zero contact between us, partly because he is running from his guilt and partly because the other woman forbids any contact between us.  Either way, I think it is mostly God protecting me from the spewings of my husband.

6:28 PM

Beth

Hannah I was so glad he went to sons and now this. D says if she puts down it is from ow and H it hurts me and if she doesn't her father gets mad. I guess being the Christian I have to let her do it. I do not understand why he wants everyone to know what he gives the boys. It doesn't bother me if anyone knows or not.

6:28 PM

nutterbutter

Swan: Thanks. But sometimes it's just hard to watch and be on the receiving end of their selfishness.

6:28 PM

Beth

Swan and Hannah should I write him back and apologize or leave it as it is?

6:29 PM

Swan

digforhelp - Yeah, unfortunately in MLC there is this thing they do, we call it replay because that is what they do, and they replay the events of insanity.  They peak out of the tunnel, then duck back in and sometimes they stay out longer other times they run back in deeper.

6:30 PM

digforhelp

Swan - when she told me today she wanted to move on, she also told me that she would always be there for me. that was weird.

6:30 PM

brin

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Hope you had a good day being grateful for something.

6:31 PM

digforhelp

hello brin , happy thanksgiving

6:32 PM

nutterbutter

Swan: Can you elaborate on how they might run back deeper into the tunnel. And when they do this, is there also more evidence of their confusion?

6:32 PM

nutterbutter

brin: Hi there, happy thanksgiving.

6:33 PM

digforhelp

nutterbutter - mine seem to be running deeper into the tunnel by demanding the legal separation. when this first began she was not going to seek divorce. now she is.

6:33 PM

Hannah

Beth I don't see you have anything to apologize for.  However when my h phoned me very angry and accused me of things I hadn't done I said “A, you have known me 35 years and you know that isn't me to do those things.  If you can't call me or email me with respect then please no contact whatsoever."    Beth I stay firm on those words now.

6:33 PM

brin

digforhelp @8:30, It sounds like your W is confused.

6:33 PM

Hannah

hi Brin, nice to see you dear friend. 

6:34 PM

Swan

digforhelp - For a time they walk that fine line of "don't want to be the bad guy/gal" and escape.  Plus there is still a connection to us and there is a part of them that needs to hold onto that, while the other part of them needs to blame us for all their problems. 

6:34 PM

brin

Hi Hannah. Good to see you applying healthy boundaries with your H e.g. the phone call.

6:34 PM

digforhelp

brin - I think she was responding to me telling her that I would always be here for her in spite of her wanting divorce. but it was still weird.

6:36 PM

digforhelp

Swan brin - but I must admit my faith has been shaken as a result of this. I'm wondering what God would have me do. I have been hearing from God or have I simply hearing what I wanted to hear?

6:36 PM

brin

digforhelp :34, Yes, it sounds weird. My H (after he left) came back many times over at least 2 years to connect with me. I think he really didn't want to divorce and thought it was the only solution for him. I think he might be seeing that he made the wrong decision.

6:36 PM

digforhelp

brin - where do things stand now?

6:37 PM

nutterbutter

digforhelp: It looks like my H ran back into the tunnel too. There has been no intimacy between us in 5+ months. But he is working on things around the house and telling me to pick out paint colors for the house. It’s confusing.

6:37 PM

Beth

Hannah I know I never said anything wrong but D knows I do not like seeing pictures of ow with him or I don't really like the idea of ow's name on a gift to the boys. I don't mind as much if it is her name or something indicating she is their grandmother. I feel bad because it really puts D in a very awkward position. She is trying to please both parents so she took the pictures off.

6:38 PM

Hannah

Beth, even if d puts the photo on facebook why does she have to say anything about who bought the shirts?  Just say I'm proud of my two nephews or something like that.

6:38 PM

Beth

nutterbutter It is all confusing and we will never live long enough to understand it.

6:38 PM

digforhelp

nutterbutter - the paint colors and working around the house sound like good signs. my wife and I was working on redoing the kitchen but she deserted that project and now tells me to pick any color I want to paint the kitchen.

6:38 PM

digforhelp

nutterbutter - that told me she was planning on exiting.

6:38 PM

brin

digforhelp :36, Pray for God’s direction, remembering that God would not contradict what He says in the Bible. As for me and my H, the D finalized this year and he married OW less than 2 weeks after the D finalized. However, I am OK and taking it well and waiting for God's timing in restoring my M.

6:40 PM

brin

nutterbutter :37, It is good that your H is still at home and doing things for you. I have heard that in MLC, they could lose interest in intimacy for a period of time.

6:40 PM

digforhelp

brin - I'm glad you're ok. I doubt very seriously if I could take such actions from my wife. Only by the grace of God have I made it this far.

6:40 PM

nutterbutter

digforhelp: I know, they are good signs. But then today after dinner while I was taking a nap, he disappears. He didn't even wake me to say he was leaving.

6:41 PM

Swan

nutterbutter - Anyone who is in a strained relationship will have moments of wanting to "fix" it before they completely severe it.  During these times the MLC person will attempt to reconnect, sometimes the expectation they put on the situation sets it up to fail.  MLCer's test, test and retest everything, they will peak out of the MLC tunnel almost even seem at times as if they are coming out of MLC, but then something will happen (real and/or imagined) and it causes them to become even more confused in their MLC spin so they withdraw.  There is also a factor of the emotions of guilt that will rise up in them as they are faced with proof of the fallout from their actions and choices, this too can cause them to disconnect.  Usually each time they reconnect after a disconnect, they period of time becomes less and less until they finally work it out and stop  running and face their issues.

6:41 PM

brin

digforhelp :40, All things are possible with God. I know that I would not have come this far without trust in God and support from the group, and prayers by friends.

6:42 PM

Beth

Hannah our son bought a second hand set of swings for them and he paid son back. He did not like the idea that DIL's mother made a comment that indicated that she thought the parents had bought it. I do not know what the big deal is who gave it to them. D already told him mom gives them things and she doesn't care if anybody knows who gave it to them or not. I think I know now why he cares. I have send a couple of things up to them and when D put the picture on facebook with the boys with the clothes on it I have made a comment about them having such  or such a thing on that grammie gave them.

6:44 PM

Beth

Hannah I never said anything this time but I have and D knows it so when H asked her why ow's name was not there she told him I would not like seeing ow's name there or something along that line.

6:44 PM

nutterbutter

brin: Even though H has been home during MLC, it’s been very difficult facing the pain and rejection daily. Seeing the looks of hatred in his eyes for me at times was challenging to say the least. But I do understand what you're saying :}

6:45 PM

digforhelp

hello wiffe and mas , happy thanksgiving

6:45 PM

wiffe

Hello all

6:45 PM

nutterbutter

Swan: Okay.  Thank you.

6:46 PM

brin

nutterbutter :44, Have you read Men in Midlife Crisis by Jim Conway and My Husband's Midlife Crisis by Sally Conway? The latter is helpful for the case (with helpful suggestions) when the MLCer is still at home.

6:46 PM

Hannah

hi mas and wiffe

6:46 PM

brin

Hi MAS and wiffe. Happy Thanksgiving.

6:47 PM

Swan

digforhelp - Questioning the unknown!!  Anyone else, NEVER done that???  We all do, our brains work in facts and the enemy whispers to us that since we don't get audible confirmation from God that we are making it up.  I would recommend spending some time with your Bible, start with the book of James.  Then ask God to give you confirmation that these things, to ask God to affirm things is not doubting Him, it is simply telling Him that you just aren't getting it and need to be sure that you or the enemy are not deceiving you.

6:47 PM

nutterbutter

brin: I have read and do refer back to Men in Midlife Crisis often. I will have to purchase the second book though.

6:47 PM

mas

Hello everyone. Happy Thanksgiving.

6:48 PM

brin

Hey Bluesky! Happy Thanksgiving. how was it?

6:49 PM

mas

All I spoke with helpme this afternoon. She says hello to everyone.

6:49 PM

wiffe

all how do you talk to H.  He keeps trying to address how I speak to him but I have stopped talking to him because I'm afraid I’m so confused.

6:49 PM

brin

nutterbutter :47, You can purchase it on this website.

6:49 PM

nutterbutter

brin :Will do!

6:49 PM

brin

wiffe :49, Can you please elaborate more as to what advice you need?

6:50 PM

Bluesky

Hi all, Brin, very nice, my d and I went to some friends house and  now we are home tucked in watching movies. Yours?

6:50 PM

nutterbutter

mas: Hi mas, how are you?

6:50 PM

Beth

Good night all. have a good weekend

6:51 PM

mas

nutterbutter Hello, it's good to see you. How have you been?

6:51 PM

brin

Bluesky :50, Good to hear yours went well. Mine too. Went to some friends from church and had a great time. I baked a from-scratch pecan pie which went down well.

6:51 PM

brin

Beth, Take care, and good weekend

6:51 PM

wiffe

brin he sent me a text saying how I looked good today but then I speak.  I didn't even talk to him.  I helped in the kitchen doing dishes for his aunt while he slept on her couch.  I just don't know but I’m tired of feeling pain and trying to do everything I can and I just don't know.  I'm sure I have a tone in my voice when we are on the phone because I'm so hurt that we aren't with him.  it's hard.  he doesn’t try to talk to me when he's around.  He seems to think I should do all the talking.

6:52 PM

Bluesky

brin wow, yummy. Myvd did some baking stuff to. My part was easy.

6:52 PM

nutterbutter

mas: I’m good, how about you?

6:53 PM

brin

wiffe :51, Have you tried asking him why he thinks you should do all the talking (if that's what he said)? BTW, didn't understand your 1st sentence.

6:53 PM

mas

nutterbutter Up and down...still on that crazy rollercoaster. I'm sure you know how that is. I'm doing okay today, though.

6:54 PM

brin

Bluesky :52, Your part was to show up? :) lucky you.

6:54 PM

Bluesky

brin well no, I made green beans and took a couple of pies. Once a upon a time I would make them from scratch.

6:55 PM

brin

Bluesky :54, Mmmm. I like green beans. My H won't eat them.

6:56 PM

nutterbutter

mas: Oh yes, I do know about the rollercoaster. But I'm glad you're doing good today:)

6:57 PM

Swan

wiffe - If I understand what you are saying, your husband is initiating conversations about the way your speak to him and he is confusing you in what he is saying?  First of all, LISTEN first, don't be concerned with addressing, defending, what your response will be, etc. just listen to what he is saying.  And when he is done don't respond immediately, you might tell him that he has given you much to digest and you would like some time to process what he is saying and that you would like to come back together with him later to discuss it once you have considered his concerns.  Then take what he is saying and seriously take into account his points.  I often pray during the comments that the Lord will allow me to hear what they are saying and to understand the importance of these things to them, to help me understand and respond in ways that will bring us together not widen the division between us.

6:57 PM

brin

MAS, What did you do for Thanksgiving today?

6:58 PM

brin

Swan :57, wiffe, Well put Swan.

6:59 PM

digforhelp

good night everyone.

6:59 PM

brin

digforhelp - good night. take care and take heart

7:00 PM

Bluesky

goodnight see you tomorrow night.

7:00 PM

mas

brin We are actually celebrating tomorrow as it was easier for my daughter. She is making dinner at her house and we will be going over tomorrow night. She works long hours so she didn't have time to prep yesterday. I'm bringing the dessert, so I spent the afternoon baking.

7:01 PM

brin

mas :00, We? Do you mean your H will be there too?

7:01 PM

wiffe

Swan we have a parade tomorrow.  The girls' asked him if he was going.  He said yes.  They then asked if he was going with us and he's like I haven't talked to mommy.  So tonight when the girls' give me the phone I asked if there was something he wanted to tell me.  Since he doesn't seem to bring it up.  I just don't know

7:01 PM

wiffe

all PRAISE  I did sign papers to have the D that H initiated taken out of the courts. 

7:01 PM

mas

brin No, my H won't be there. My mother and brothers are going.

7:02 PM

brin

mas :01, OK. Hope you all have a good family time tomorrow.

7:02 PM

nutterbutter

All: Goodnight, I have an early day at work tomorrow!

7:02 PM

mas

brin Thank you.

7:02 PM

brin

Night nuttebutter

7:10 PM

Swan

wiffe - Did he ask to speak to you?  Why did the girls give you the phone?  He doesn't bring it up because in his mind there was nothing left to talk about, he said yes.  In the MLC mind he is being hounded about this parade, he was asked if he was going, then he was asked again with the request to define who all would be included, then you get on the phone and press it by asking if there is something he wants to tell you.  We need finite answers, they speak in generalalizations, either way we each drive the other crazy.  Your questions and what he most likely believes questions by the girls (prompted by you) are more than he can handle, it is causing him stress and even when he agrees to do something, once the questions start it will cause him to rethink his agreement and most times when he does that, he will not follow though and his response when questioned will be something like, he changed his mind, something came up or to attack in defense.

7:12 PM

brin

Swan, Looks like there will be no retreat this year?

7:15 PM

Swan

brin - You know the time of year has been changing the past few years to the point that I kind of forgot about it.  I know Bill's schedule is pretty full, there was talk about having it in San Diego again between some of his traveling, guess it couldn't be coordinated to fit into his travel schedule.

7:16 PM

brin

Swan :15, I see. I just remembered too.

7:16 PM

mas

brin The last I heard, he had said something about having it in the spring.

7:17 PM

mas

brin I had asked him about it in chat one night.

7:17 PM

brin

mas :16, OK. That makes sense since it's nearly the end of the year already.

7:17 PM

brin

mas, thanks for asking him. I haven't been in the Monday chats in a very long time.

7:18 PM

mas

brin  Neither have I. This was about a month ago.

7:18 PM

mas

Hi Joey.

7:18 PM

brin

Hey Joey - Happy Thanksgiving

7:19 PM

Joey

hi guys, just remembered chat, was on phone with another stander friend. how is everyone?

7:19 PM

mas

Joey How was your Thanksgiving?

7:19 PM

brin

Joey :19, Good. Had a great time with good friends today. How about you?

7:20 PM

Joey

e-mailed in laws and just had a reply back from my stepmother-n-law. H signed in online while I was on computer but he didn't reply to e-mail this yr wishing him happy thanksgiving.

7:20 PM

Swan

Joey - Hey girl, how are you

7:21 PM

Joey

all, thanksgiving meal and family was great. I got to rock my 5 month old great nephew to sleep and see other niece, nephews and great nephews today.

7:22 PM

brin

Joey, Glad you had a good family time and that at least your step mom-in-law responded to you holiday greetings.

7:23 PM

Joey

brin I just replied back with some light info about what I was going to be doing as far as tree & shrub trimming with my dad and something’s we are going to be doing to the sunroom.  I also mentioned that I did everything myself last yr and it took over 3 hrs. that this yr I needed the tops taken out of some trees so I needed help.

7:24 PM

Joey

mas, how are things for you sweetie?

7:25 PM

Swan

Joey - There is just something about rocking a little one to sleep and then holding for a while.  I used to love to hold my grandson when he slept.

7:25 PM

brin

Joey :24, Good for you for trimming your tree, etc. I didn't decorate my tree last year and don't plan to this year - because it reminds me of my H's absence when I decorate the tree. He used to do it with my step kids.

7:26 PM

Joey

Swan I think it surprised some of them that I did it :)

7:26 PM

mas

Joey I'm doing okay, thank you for asking. Still on a bit of a rollercoaster, but my one praise is that my daughter and I are on speaking terms again, so I'm very grateful for that.

7:27 PM

mas

Joey I so glad you had a nice family Thanksgiving.

7:27 PM

Joey

brin decorate it for YOU, I struggle with decorating to especially since my tree is my in-laws very 1st tree but once it’s up I'm glad and it lifts my spirits.

7:28 PM

Joey

mas wonderful, that is a praise!!!!

7:28 PM

brin

Joey :27, And after decorating it, I procrastinate taking it down. I think 1 year it was up into February!

7:29 PM

Joey

brin   HA, I have a former male co-worker that purposely leaves his tree up every yr that long!!! he puts valentine decorations on it before taking it down and almost doesn't then!!!

7:30 PM

Swan

mas - I am so glad to hear that you and your daughter are on speaking terms.  Definitely a praise on this day of thanks.

7:30 PM

brin

Joey :29, That's funny. And by that time, I am definitely tired of seeing the decorations and wonder if I ever want to see them again (next year).

7:30 PM

mas

Swan Yes, it really is, thank you.

7:31 PM

brin

mas :26, Yes, It's definitely a praise that you and your d are talking again. I'd forgotten that you weren't. How awesome that she's doing TG dinner too.

7:31 PM

Joey

brin go ahead and set your mind to put it up this year and we'll help you set a time to get it down!

7:31 PM

brin

Joey :31, Ha ha ha.

7:32 PM

brin

All, I should be going. Have had a headache all evening. Still dealing with a hyperthyroid. God is good and is slowing healing me though. Goodnight.

7:32 PM

Joey

brin I'm serious!  brighten up things this yr for yourself!!!!! Think of it as doing it for Jesus.

7:32 PM

mas

brin Goodnight!

7:33 PM

brin

Joey - I'll try. :)

7:33 PM

Joey

brin, hope you feel better!!! love ya!!!

7:33 PM

mas

brin Feel better!

7:33 PM

Swan

brin - goodnight, a little anointing oil and prayer often works on headaches.

7:34 PM

mas

All  I'm going to say goodnight, too. Enjoy the rest of your holiday, everyone!

7:34 PM

Joey

all, I need to go work on my Beth Moore Bible study, last week of it. Plus need prayer time in my window as well.  love to all!!!!!

7:34 PM

Hannah

goodnight Joey

7:38 PM

Hannah

goodnight all, sleep well

7:39 PM

Swan

Well hope everyone has a great night, see you all tomorrow evening for Friday night chat.

6:18 PM

nutterbutter

Swan: Why is the MLC'r so selfish!

6:25 PM

Swan

nutterbutter - Because emotionally they are about three and that is a very selfish age!!  Because there is something inside of them telling them that they have done everything in their lives for someone else, it started with trying to please their parents, teachers, other adults, then as they became adults, employers, friends, spouses, children, etc.  For whatever reason they feel that they have always had to put themselves last and now they are rebelling and putting themselves first and behaving very selfishly in the pursuit of that.

 

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Chat Room Acronyms

Guests often use acronyms to speed up their conversations. Here are a few examples for you:

I have been S from my H for 2 years. We have 3 children, S8, S13, and D16.
I have been Separated from my Husband for 2 years. We have 3 children, Son age 8, Son age 13, Daughter age 16.
  OW = Other Woman   AW  = Adulteress Woman   W  = Wife   OP = other person
  OM  = Other Man   AM  = Adulteress Man   H  = Husband   LBS = Left behind spouse
  D = divorce or daughter   S = son or sister or separated   XW  = ex-wife   GF = Girl Friend
  DIL = daughter-in-law   SIL = Sister-in-law or Son-in-law   XH  = ex-husband   BF = Boy Friend
  MIL = mother-in-law   MLC = Midlife Crisis   PG = Praise God   CS = Child Support
  FIL = father-in-law   MLD = Midlife Dimensions Ministry   PTL = Praise the Lord   ED = Erectile Dysfunction
  w/ = with   w/e = weekend   b/c = because   
  w/o = without   BRB / be right back   LOL / laughing out loud